


Not Going At All

by brilligspoons



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Cuddling and Snuggling, Episode Tag, Gen, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Team Dynamics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-19
Updated: 2012-02-19
Packaged: 2017-10-31 10:08:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/342830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brilligspoons/pseuds/brilligspoons
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post episode 2x10 - Steve needs his team within easy reach.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Going At All

The first night back after being tortured in North Korea, Steve falls asleep to the sound of Joe rummaging around in his cupboards for something to eat. He dreams of bright, crackling flashes of light and a silver crucifix against cold skin, and when he wakes up, he's gasping for breath and has a death grip on the slats of his headboard. It's still full dark, and somewhere down the hall Joe is snoring loud enough to wake the dead, a heavy sawing noise that cuts through the sound of the water breaking on the shoreline. He takes his hands off the slats and works the stiffness out of them, then gets out of bed and makes his way outside. He slides the door behind him, cutting off Joe's sleepy murmurs entirely, and stares at the ocean until sunrise.

Steve jumps when Joe sets a cup of coffee down next to him. The morning light is still pale and hazy, and Steve can barely make out that the mug he's been given was his father's favorite.

Joe sips at his own coffee. "Suppose it's too much to ask that you got a decent night's rest," he says. Steve shrugs and says nothing. Joe takes another sip and pats him on the shoulder gently. "Right."

"I'll be fine," Steve says. He winces at the sound of his own voice. "I will."

***

"Chin _stepped on my foot_."

"Yeah, because you were mouthing off to Denning," Chin says. "We were supposed to play it cool."

Danny scoffs at him. "'Play it cool'? Dude, mouthing off might as well be my job, okay? If I didn't give a little lip, it'd be weird, and that would set off all of Denning's alarms. 'Act natural' was, I believe, the advice we were given by Joe." He reaches out and slaps at Steve's hands. "Stop picking at your bandages already, jesus."

Steve glares at him but obediently drops his hands to clutch at the armrests.

"He signed it, didn't he?" Danny continues. Chin sighs.

"He did sign it," he concedes. "But he _knows_."

"What do you mean, 'he knows'? Of course he knows. You think us disappearing overseas right after I go ask Denning for help only to be denied isn't going to tip him off? We are the _least_ subtle. How we've managed to accomplish all this shit in the last year or so is beyond me."

Officially, Steve is on a much deserved and overdue vacation that was planned long in advance and has absolutely nothing to do with how he dropped off the radar and reemerged a few days later looking like he'd gone five rounds with a lawn mower. Chin had worded the time off request to make it sound like Steve himself had written it, and then Danny had very cleverly backdated and crinkles the form so that it looks like it merely got lost in the bureaucratic shuffle. And since most of the state is aware of the fact that Steve McGarrett likes to live a little dangerously, bandages and a few newly-acquired scars won't cause much of a ruckus when he gets back.

"Spearfishing, by the way," Danny says.

Steve blinks at him. "Huh?"

"The governor, he says don't beat up too many sharks while you're spearfishing." Danny waves a hand at him. "Don't forget to come up with a story or two, okay? And tell all of us so we can corroborate."

Steve sighs and runs a hand through his hair. He glances around the room and, for some inexplicable reason, his heart starts to race. "Hey, uh," he says, "where are Kono and Lori?"

Chin looks up at him from the magazine he'd been flipping through. "Handling something for HPD," he says. "Some drug dealers were apprehended this morning, and the detectives on the case thought they might relate to one of our cases. I told them to find out what they could and pick up some beer on their way over here."

Steve's breathing gets shallower. "Have you checked in with them?" he demands. "Recently? At all?" Chin and Danny exchange a look, and Steve suddenly feels the urge to punch both of them in the face. Danny pulls out his cell phone and presses something, then hands it to Steve without a word. He takes it and listens, then exhales sharply when Kono picks up the other end. "Kono, hi. Listen, pick up something harder than beer, too, okay? Thanks, be safe, bye."

He hands the phone back to Danny, whose lips twist into a thin smile.

"Say nothing," Steve says.

"Do you want a snack?" Danny asks. "Grace and I made dirt cake yesterday, and I brought some of the leftovers with me."

"Dirt cake?" Chin and Steve speak simultaneously. Danny starts in on a detailed explanation on how to make it with Oreos and cream cheese and cool whip and gummi worms, and then something about one of his sisters' bridal shower. By the time Kono and Lori arrive with a bottle of whiskey and a 12-pack of beer, the three of them have demolished the cake and moved on to the steaks Steve had stashed in his freezer before leaving for North Korea.

"I can't believe you finished dessert without us," Lori grumbles. "I was looking forward to that stuff."

Kono hands her a beer and clinks her own against it. "These guys, they have no respect for the hard work we've been doing while they got to lie around on the couch all day," she says with a wink to Steve.

He grins at her and feels himself relax muscle by muscle as the night progresses.

***

And then suddenly it's midnight, and Kono and Chin are sounding like they're thinking about leaving soon, and Lori looks like she's regretting that lost shot of whiskey a little. Danny's been nursing the same beer since the steaks came off the grill and had, at some point, mentioned his plans for hanging out with Grace the next day. But it isn't until Lori starts rummaging around for her bag that the panic starts welling up inside Steve's chest again.

"You sure you should be driving?" he asks her. The whole room goes quiet, and he looks at each of them in turn. "You sure any of you should be driving?"

Danny taps his nail against the glass bottle in his hand. "It _is_ kind of late," he murmurs. "I don't have to pick the monkey up until 9 or so anyway."

"I'm maybe a little drunk," Lori admits, and Kono bursts out laughing.

Steve stands up from the couch, careful not to move too quickly. Chin grabs hold of his arm and tries to make it seem like he's doing so to catch Steve's attention, not because Steve is shaking ever so slightly.

"You sure about us invading your space like this?" he asks.

Steve pats his hand and nods, then directs Kono to the linen closet for extra blankets and pillows. He notices her grabbing a toothbrush from a bag he hadn't seen her bring in as she follows behind him and raises an eyebrow. She raises one right back at him, daring him to say something about it. He lifts his hands in a show of submission, and Kono gifts him with a blinding smile.

Lori and Danny end up having a scuffle over who gets to sleep in the armchair, and Steve catches Chin and Kono flipping a coin for the couch versus the guest bedroom. He stands on the bottom step and takes in the sight of his team, all four of them arguing over sleeping arrangements. His heart twists painfully in his chest, and he makes a noise that calls all of their attention to him.

"Uh," he says, gesturing up the stairs toward his room. "I, um. I might. Well."

Danny is, surprisingly, the first to understand the request that Steve can barely _think_ let alone speak out loud.

"You're lucky your bed's big, McGarrett," he says as he shoves past Steve on the stairs. Lori follows close behind him, shooing Steve up before her, and Chin and Kono turn off the downstairs lights and lock the door before coming up after them.

Danny's standing next to the bed when Steve arrives. He waves at it, and Lori pushes Steve forward, causing him to stumble onto the mattress.. Steve rearranges himself, wincing at the pressure on his shoulders, and then Lori and Kono are bracketing him with Danny and Chin snuggling in close on the edges of the bed.

"If I fall off during the night," Danny says, "I am making all of you pay for my chiropractor bill, you hear me?"

"Go to sleep," Chin murmurs, already halfway there himself.

Kono and Lori manage to wrap their arms around Steve, and the panic he's expecting to set in never comes. Instead, Steve sighs and reaches out with one arm over Lori and grabs hold of Danny's shirt.

"I won't let you fall," he says, and then he closes his eyes and sleeps.


End file.
